Finding my funny bone.....

When I first thought of not drinking every again a horrible thought occured to me, "I will never have fun again". Pathetic isn't it?! Yet I worried about social functions, being able to relax, striking up conversations and most of all having fun. Alcohol was such a big part of my life that I couldn't imagine doing these things without it. I was always the crazy one who would try anything. I remember being in a martini bar with some girlfriends sitting at a table in front of the bar, and I said, "Let's card all the young looking people as they come in"! So sure enough we did. And then I said "if they are organ donor, make sure the back of their license is signed" and we did get five people who had organ donor stickers on their licenses to sign the back. Plus it was hilarious the number of young people that turned around and left when we asked to see some ID. The place was packed so I don't know if the owner's knew what we were doing or if they just didn't care. So now I attend events, dinners, etc. clean and sober. I was nervous. The first dinner party I went to three weeks into recovery worked out well because my son was in a curling tournament so I left to go watch him, they were late getting on the ice because the tournament was not running on time, so I arrived back at the party just in time to leave. But being without my crutch made me feel I wasn't going to have a good time at these things. I would probably have a so so time and that would be it for the rest of my life. Well I was proven wrong. Last night our best friend's came to dinner at our house with their sweet daughter. And I found myself laughing out loud most of the night, in fact we had a lot of conversation and laughter around the dinner table, and I was sober. It then dawned on me that there is fun without alcohol. Good clean fun. You see I always wanted a party. To step things up. I always looked down on the kids in high school that didn't drink. They weren't cool enough to know how to have real fun. Well I wasn't cool enough to just have fun. Our society has glamorized drinking so much that it's as normal as brushing your teeth. It was so nice to sit and laugh, and clean up the kitchen and go to bed and not worry about waking up with a hangover. I'm finally realizing that the alcohol didn't make me, that I'm still the same funny, silly, fun person I always was and the best part about enjoying an evening with friends sober, is being able to remember it the next day.......