Friday, April 15, 2011

In search of time for me......

Crazy week. Way too much going on. The last two months of school in the spring are the worst. My teenager is swamped with field trips, papers, tests, deadlines etc..he has his nails chewed to a new all time low. My younger two have field trips, class events, lock-ins, birthday sleepovers etc. It's gottten so bad that I had to schedule an afternoon off to fit in a final check on Alex's foot that he had surgery on. I'm running in one direction and my husband is going in another. I feel overwhelmed! Like I've slipped below the surface. This is not a good place for an alcoholic to be in. It's worse than thin ice. I was going over some things with a collegue this morning and she leans in and says, "did you ever just slip up and take even one sip?" I looked at her and said, "no why would I?" to which she replied, "well people say it's so hard to quit drinking and you made it look so easy, that I just thought".......What I wanted to say is "You thought wrong!" then this person went on to say, "hey, you're doing so good I bet you don't even need those meetings anymore!" Every fiber of my being stiffened! "Not need meetings anymore?" The day I do not need meetings anymore is the day I feel I'm cured, and I'm far from cured. Now in this person's defense they don't quite get the whole "recovering" alcoholic bit. I am forever a work in progress. There isn't another option for me. It's been proven over and over to me that God and AA are doing for me what I could not do for myself. I haven't hit a meeting all week, and I'm ready to crawl out of my skin. Every nerve is crying, "I need to talk to people who understand me! I need my AA peeps!" So I went into my office, shut the door, closed the blinds, and set my head on the desk. "God grant me.....I am always amazed at how many times God speaks to me per day. Today he used a coworker to say, "Liz you need a meeting". I need a realignment. I need to be in a room full of people that suffer just like I do on a daily basis. They get me, they don't question me, they know just what I need. So I will hit a meeting on my way home from work tonight. I don't think I can make the weekend without it. I hope to catch up on blogs today, and I hope you all have a happy spring weekend. We have snow, ice, and rain coming tomorrow. Only in Wisconsin......:)


  1. smiles...its good to have those peeps when you need them and life gets hectic and we need reminding...hope you have a serene weekend!

  2. It is funny when people say things like that and you know they just don't understand, they are not alcoholics. Glad you took the time to ask your HP for some help. Take care of you!!

  3. Too many people want a "quick fix"..So I'm thinking your colleague was thinking that a set number of meetings just had to be enough. Nobody wants to work "until", they just want the 6 week course or the 10 day diet and everything is done. No more worries..The no more worries part comes because we work "until" and in doing so become stronger and worry free..